Thursday, July 12, 2012

Terrible Twos...

Disclosure:  I love Delaney more than anything on this planet!  She is the light of my life, and I wouldn't give her up for anything!  This is just a vent and a record of her at this point in her life!

That being said, she is testing me lately!  She is a strong, stubborn, independent child that is too smart for her own good!   It seems that these days are a constant battle of wills between her and I.  I fear for my sanity when the teenage years roll around!  I can already hear the screaming matches and slamming doors! 

Everything is a challenge...getting dressed, eating dinner, going to bed, leaving the house, sharing, taking a bath, etc.  Nothing is easy!  I think this is payback for the "easy" newborn that never cried and slept through the night at 6 weeks!  Things were getting too comfortable!

She now throws things at people, dogs, tables, you name it.  The other day we were putting her shoes on so we could go outside.  She walked across the room to pick them up, and came back with that look on her face that spells "NAUGHTY".  I said, "Delaney don't throw your shoes."  10 seconds later her shoes were flying in my face at warp speed!  I had already lost track of how many time outs she had that afternoon, so I sent her to her room for the first time in her life.  And, get this, she cried!  She actually was upset with the consequences of her actions.  She stood in her bedroom doorway and cried!  I thought it was an epiphany.  A disciplinary action that might actually affect her!  I haven't played the "go to your room card" since, but I'm keeping it at the ready in my back pocket! 

I must explain that Delaney is a smartass smart, intelligent, honest little girl that will answer "yes" to the following questions among others that any other kid would say "no" to:
  1. "Delaney, do you need a time out?"
  2. "Delaney, do you like to make Mommy sad?"
  3. "Delaney, are you being naughty?"
  4. "Delaney, do you need to go to bed?"
How do you get through to a kid that has no fear of consequences?  Obviously, I'm an easy mark in her eyes and she typically only pulls this stuff with me.  Thank GOD as I'm sure we'd have been kicked out of daycare by now if she behaved that way over there!  I know she is testing me, but I can't help feel like I'm failing at this whole mothering-thing right now! Even her beloved Papa has mentioned she may be a great tool in anti-terrorism interrogation!  That's serious!

She has also figured out how to turn on the sweetness when she wants something in true diva form.  This is a typical last ditch effort to extend bedtime.  She'll go through the whole bit..."Mommy, D go potty? Need a drink of water? Mommy, love you!  Kisses?  Hugs?  Rock-a-bye? Twinkle, twinkle?"  Don't get me wrong it's all adorable and cute, but the girl needs to sleep at night.  She's like her mother in that respect...too little sleep creates a monster the next day! The transition to a big girl bed is still a marathon versus a dash!  It still takes at least an hour every night for her to cave and go to sleep, and she's up at the crack of dawn coming into our room before our alarms most mornings!

She has figured out that I can't cook.  She almost always refuses to eat dinner.  She's usually good with fruit, veggies, and condiments (ketchup/ranch with a spoon?!?), but anything else is "Mommy, no like it!".  Seriously, Craig must be brainwashing her when I'm not around.  She won't even taste or try it before passing judgment.  I know I'm no gourmet chef, but I try and I eat it!  Dinner is also a three ring circus most nights.  We have to make at least one trip to the bathroom mid-meal, regardless if I ask right before we sit down she will always wait until we're part way through the meal.  She also has to have exactly the right ceiling lights on/off and ceiling fans on/off depending on her mood.  (She can reach the switches at our house...fun times!)  She has also figured out that Izzy will enjoy most of her leftovers.  In fact, last week one night we weren't looking and suddenly Delaney's entire plate of food was on the floor being devoured by our beloved beagle.  Izzy was in heaven, and Delaney was in the doghouse! 

I realize that they are quite comical to the outside, and now in hindsight I tend to agree.  In the heat of the moment though, I'm ready to pull my hair out!  Good thing she's so stinking cute, and we love her to pieces!

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